Permissive vs Perfect

Where do we fall?
Permissive Will or Perfect Will?

Yes, GOD requires us to fully walk according to HIS will, but why is it that others who believe in HIM still go to the wrong direction. GOD is so good that HE allows HIS children to make a choice (free will).


Where do we usually fall?
...in choosing a lifetime partner...

2 Corinthians 6:14 says, "Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers, for what fellowship hath righteousness with unrighteousness? And what communion hath light with darkness?" Some would say that it is their way of bringing people to JESUS. Others might be thinking that this command is a contradiction to what GOD said in Roman 8:1a, "There is therefore now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus." So what's it gonna be?

Here we fall under permissive will, especially when we marry an unbeliever. Yes, your spouse could have been somebody else but still you chose to be with that partner from the time you married your other half. It doesn't mean leaving your partner when problems come, thinking that they are happening because you two were never meant to be together. And that shouldn't be the case. The fact that you received the permissive will of GOD, it means HE ALLOWED you to marry your chosen partner. It means keeping your spouse-by-choice as you would have kept GOD's chosen one.

In every marriage, there will always be trials, tribulation and temptations. And separation or split up shouldn't be an option whether you're in the perfect will of GOD or in the permissive will. THE BLESSING OF GOD IS STILL IN YOUR MARRIAGE, wherever you may be.

TOP 10 BIGGEST BRAIN DAMAGING HABITS

No Breakfast
People who do not take breakfast are going to have a lower blood sugar level. This leads to an insufficient supply of nutrients to the brain causing brain degeneration.

Overeating
It causes hardening of the brain arteries, leading to a decrease in mental power

Smoking
It causes multiple brain shrinkage and may lead to Alzheimer disease.

High Sugar Consumption
Too much sugar will interrupt the absorption of proteins and nutrients causing malnutrition and may interfere with brain development.

Air Pollution
The brain is the largest oxygen consumer in our body. Inhaling polluted air the supply of oxygen to the brain, bringing about a decrease in brain efficiency.

Sleep Deprivation
Sleep allows our brain to rest. Long term deprivation from sleep will accelerate the death of brain cells.

Head Covered While Sleeping
Sleeping with the head covered, increases the concentration of carbon dioxide decrease concentration of oxygen that may lead to brain damaging effects.

Working Your Brain During Illness
Working hard or studying with sickness may lead to a decrease in effectiveness of the brain as well as damage the brain.

Lacking In Stimulating Thoughts
Thinking is the best way to train our brain, lacking in brain stimulation thoughts may cause brain shrinkage.

Talking Rarely
Intellectual conversations will promote the efficiency of the brain.

Praise and Worship Leading...

This afternoon, when my hubby and I were bonding without our little Nijo, I mentioned to him that I miss worship leading. It has been months since I did lead the worship because of some family concerns. And of course, Noel, being our music leader, he suggested not talk too much when leading and set aside personal and emotional concerns.

With regard to that, he asked me to study the difference between exhortation during worship and prayer. When you first think about it, it is really easy to distinguish exhortation from prayer. But when you're up there leading the worship, you cannot identify what you're saying.

Here I am looking for articles or even books about worship leading. There are a lot of articles, sites, and the like that are helpful. I even found books of Pastor Steve Pruitt very relevant...

Deadly Signs of Song Leading?

1. Not knowing what you are doing.
2. Not preparing the other worshippers.
3. Leading obscure songs.
4. Slowing down.
5. Keeping your nose in the song book.
6. Singing the wrong part.
7. Destroying the dignity of the service.

Read on...

Causes of Liver Damage

1. Sleeping too late and waking up too late are the main causes.
2. Not urinating in the morning.
3. Too much eating.
4. Skipping breakfast.
5. Consuming too much medication.
6. Consuming too much preservatives, additives, food coloring, and artificial sweetener.
7. Consuming unhealthy cooking oil. As much as possible reduce cooking oil use when frying, which includes even the best cooking oils like olive oil. Do not consume fried foods when you are tired, except if the body is very fit.
8. Consuming raw (overly done) foods also add to the burden of liver. Veggies should be eaten raw or cooked 3-5 parts. Fried veggies should be finished in one sitting, do not store.
   
   We should prevent this without necessarily spending more. We just have to adopt a good daily lifestyle and eating habits. Maintaining good eating habits and time condition are very important for our bodies to absorb and get rid of unnecessary chemicals according to "schedule."
   
   Because:

• 9PM – 11PM → is the time for eliminating unnecessary toxic chemicals (detoxification) from the antibody system (lymph nodes). This time duration should be spent by relaxing or listening to music. If during this time a housewife is still in an unrelaxed state such as washing the dishes or monitoring children doing their homework, this will have a negative impact on health.
• 11PM – 1AM → is the detoxification process in the liver, and ideally should be done in a deep sleep state.
• 1AM – 3AM → detoxification process in the gall, ideally done in a deep sleep state.
• 3AM – 5AM → detoxification in the lungs. Therefore there will sometimes be a severe cough for cough sufferers during this time. Since the detoxification process had reached the respiratory tract, there is no need to take cough medicine so as not to interfere with toxin removal process.
• 5AM – 7AM → detoxification in the colon, you should empty your bowel.
• 7AM – 9AM → absorption of nutrients in the small intestine, you should be having breakfast at this time. Breakfast should be earlier, before 6:30am, for those who are sick. Breakfast before 7:30AM is very beneficial to those wanting to stay fit. Those who always skip breakfast, they should change their habits, and it is still better to eat breakfast late until 9AM - 10AM rather than no meal at all.
  
  Sleeping so late and waking up too late will disrupt the process of removing unnecessary chemicals. Aside from that, midnight to 4:00AM is the time when the bone marrow produces blood. Therefore, have a good sleep and don't sleep late.

My Mom is the Best...

I'm glad I'm one...

Upper Room at 19

TO GOD BE ALL THE HIGHEST GLORY AND HONOUR!!!

It's UPPER ROOM INTERNATIONAL FAMILY MINISTRY's 19th Anniversary celebration on 22 November 2008 at 3:ooPM which will be held at UP Film Institute, UP Diliman, QC.

YOU ARE ALL INVITED... Please come to know and receive CHRIST.

US Elections

Few days from now will mark another chapter in the US history...

On November 4 will be the much-awaited Presidential Election. The big question is, "WHO WILL IT BE?"


Will it be Barack Hussein Obama II?

• First African American to be nominated for the highest position in the land
• US Senator from Illinois
• Was Civil Rights Attorney before serving in the Senate

Habout John Sidney McCain III?

• US Senator from Arizona
• Was elected to the US House of Representatives
• Was a Naval Aviator

The information mentioned above should not be the only basis for choosing the best. The positions that they've handled aren't the only passport to the White House. Be wise, Americans!!! It wouldn't affect the US alone but the whole world, especially the Philippines.

Like for instance, the roller-coaster cost of dollar in the market affects the Philippine economy in so many ways. This could be an advantage to some, but a burden to others. When the dollar drops, the families of the OFWs are the most blessed in the land. But of course, the Philippine government would be releasing bigger amount of PESO to pay our debts.

Whew!!!

What's with Me?

This is just for fun...
Who I am is GOD's workmanship in process...

What Carol Means

You are very open. You communicate well, and you connect with other people easily. You are a naturally creative person. Ideas just flow from your mind. A true chameleon, you are many things at different points in your life. You are very adaptable. You are usually the best at everything ... you strive for perfection. You are confident, authoritative, and aggressive. You have the classic “Type A” personality. You are wild, crazy, and a huge rebel. You're always up to something. You have a ton of energy, and most people can't handle you. You're very intense. You definitely are a handful, and you're likely to get in trouble. But your kind of trouble is a lot of fun. You are well rounded, with a complete perspective on life. You are solid and dependable. You are loyal, and people can count on you. At times, you can be a bit too serious. You tend to put too much pressure on yourself. You are relaxed, chill, and very likely to go with the flow. You are light hearted and accepting. You don't get worked up easily. Well adjusted and incredibly happy, many people wonder what your secret to life is.

What's Your Name's Hidden Meaning?

Value of a Professional

Ever heard the story of the giant ship engine that failed? The ship's owners tried one expert afteranother, but none of them could figure out how to fix the engine. Then they brought in an old man who had been fixing ships since he was a youngster. He carried a large bag of tools with him, and when he arrived, he immediately went to work.

He inspected the engine very carefully, top to bottom. Two of the ship's owners were there, watching thisman, hoping he would know what to do. Afterlooking things over, the old man reached into his bag and pulled out a small hammer. He gently tapped something. Instantly, the engine lurched into life.He carefully put his hammer away. The engine was fixed!

A week later, the owners received a bill from the oldman for ten thousand dollars.

"What?!" the owners exclaimed. "He hardly did anything!"

So they wrote the old man a note saying, "Please send us an itemized bill."

The man sent a bill that read:

Tapping with a hammer ............ ....... $2.00
Knowing where to tap ............ ..... $ 9998.00

”Effort is important, but knowing where to make aneffort in your life makes all the difference.”

English Grammar

What's with English grammar?
Why is it so important?
Why are Filipinos so critical about their kababayan's incorrect grammar yet accept the flawed English of other nationality?
Why do we think that fluent-English speaking Filipinos are so intellectual and the not-so-good ones are slow.
What is the effect of call centers here in the Philippines that made more Filipinos feel that they're so good?
Have you noticed that not all Americans speak good English?

Yeah, I am impressed with Filipinos who speak really good English.
But that doesn't mean that they're the best.

English grammar should be learned,
But it shouldn't be the basis of judgment.

Instead of criticizing
Teach without offending.

Joy in the midst...

We still have joy despite the sickness because we have JESUS who truly heals.
We have assurance of healing and provision.
We have confidence in the ONE true GOD!

My Baby's Development

At 10 months, there's so much to watch out for.
He moves a lot...
Like his brains are going at full speed, all the time.

He crawls hastily like spiderman
Though stands up cautiously like an oldman

He learns words instantly
And identifies objects immediately

His actions are precise
And his reactions are defined

He talks as if he understands the things around him
He responds as if he grasps your thoughts

More developments to come...
I enjoy every progress that he reveals.

Never Give Up

That's what I said to myself these past few days.
Another trial had come and here we are still standing
Not because of our own strength but because of JESUS.
He sustains, HE strengthens, HE heals, HE provides joy
In the midst of adversity.

If GOD answers your prayers,
HE is increasing your faith.

If HE delays,
He is increasing your patience.

If HE DOESN'T answer,
HE is preparing the best for you.

Genesis 7:1

THEN THE LORD SAID TO NOAH, "COME INTO THE ARK, YOU AND ALL YOUR HOUSEHOLD, BECAUSE I HAVE SEEN YOU ARE RIGHTEOUS BEFORE ME IN THIS GENERATION."
(GENESIS 7:1)

Everything we need to know about life, we can learn from Noah’s Ark...

1. Don't miss the boat.
2. Remember that we are all in the same boat.
3. Plan ahead. It wasn't raining when Noah built the Ark.
4. Stay fit. When you're 600 years old, someone may ask you to do something really big.
5. Don't listen to critics; just get on with the job that needs to be done.
6. Build your future on high ground.
7. For safety sake, travel in pairs.
8. Speed isn't always an advantage. The snails were on board with the cheetahs.
9. When you're stressed, float a while.
10. Remember, the Ark was built by amateurs; the Titanic by professionals.
11. No matter the storm, when you are with God, there's always a rainbow waiting.
12. Not everybody is always welcome. In Noah's case, the woodpecker might have to go!

MyHotComments

First Step...

Mark this date... We were amazed and surprised... We were so excited to notice this smart adventure.

When I was about to give Nijo a bath this morning, he showed some achievement for the day. That he might be trying for quite some time to make us even more proud of him. Nijo started standing up without any help... He took his first step... alone. And wants to do it again and again, mastering it as a gain. He even uses this to cheer up his dad, when daddy predents to be crying.

His eyes full of joy whenever we shout "hurray" and say "You're great!" What a blessing to know that he understands how to make his folks' stressful days lighter.

He simply makes us smile in the midst of uncertainty saying that everything's gonna be perfect. Nijo is indeed GOD's angel brought to our lives to let us know that HE is in control and HE will really make everything perfect in HIS time.

Barack in White House... Call Centers in the Philippines

Barack in White House... what does it do to Filipinos?

This could be very alarming to Filipinos working in call centers and other outsourcing companies based here in the Philippines. It's because of Obama's strong principle on "patriot employment," meaning making use of the human resources in the US to the max to prevent the nation's economic plunge.

As I understand it, The Patriot Employer Act of 2007 only encourages employers to invest more within the US territory rather than moving their headquarters or extending their offices overseas for more affordable expenses on salaries, taxes and benefits for employees. It is actually giving privileges and credits to companies who will be willing to bunk for the Americans.

“Instead of providing incentives for employers to outsource and move their headquarters overseas, we should encourage corporations to be patriot employers that create good jobs with good benefits for American workers,” said Senator Obama. “Patriot employers help maintain American competitiveness in the global marketplace, while keeping our workforce and our middle class strong.”

Whew... let's see...

The Patriot Employers legislation would provide a tax credit equal to 1% of taxable income to employers that:

• Invest in American jobs, by maintaining or increasing the number of full-time workers in America relative to the number of full-time workers outside of America AND by maintaining corporate headquarters in America if the company has ever been headquartered in America.
• Pay decent wages, by paying each worker an hourly wage that would ensure that a full-time worker would earn enough to keep a family of three out of poverty (at least $ 7.80 per hour).
• Prepare workers for retirement, by providing either a defined benefit plan OR a defined contribution plan that fully matches at least 5% of worker contributions for every employee.
• Provide health insurance, by paying at least 60% of each worker’s health care premiums.
• Support the troops, by paying the difference between regular salary and military salary for all National Guard and Reserve employees who are called for active duty AND by continuing their health insurance coverage for the Guard member and his or her family.

How to Pray with GOD's Power

Jack Graham

If your life is anything like mine, it is pressure-packed. It is full of stress, illness, pain, and disappointment... all sorts of things that can weigh you down.

And when life is filled with these kinds of tensions, prayer can often seem like a real chore...something you know you should be doing, but never get around to!

The fact is, finding the time to pray is hard work. There is something within us...a weakness...that makes it difficult. At times it is difficult to know what to pray. At other times, you just don't know what to say. And then there are times when you just don't feel like praying at all!

This human weakness...the flesh...is our main enemy when it comes to prayer. But praise God...He knows we are weak and that we need His power to pray.

That is why God has graciously provided you and me Someone to help us pray. That person is none other than the Spirit of God Himself.

Through the Holy Spirit, God promises that whatever your circumstance may be...whether you're in physical suffering, in mental anguish, or in spiritual struggles...He will be your partner in prayer. He will empower you to pray. In fact, the Bible tells us that He even groans in prayer on your behalf (Romans 8:26)!

There are five key areas where God's Spirit helps you pray in real power. These are:

1. Lack of concern. By nature, you and I tend to be lazy and lethargic when it comes to prayer. The flesh does not want to pray, but the Spirit does. So in our moment of weakness He comes along beside us and helps us want to pray.

2. Lack of communion. Many people don't pray because they feel like there is a distance between them and God. But Galatians 4:6 says, "...God has sent forth the Spirit of His Son into your hearts, crying out, Abba, Father." The Holy Spirit helps us sense God's presence-the closeness of our communion with Him-when we pray.

3. Lack of content. As humans, not only do we not naturally know what to pray for, we don't even know how to pray! So what does the Holy Spirit do? He teaches us what to say. How does the Holy Spirit do this? By teaching us to listen. When we listen to God in prayer...when we stay long enough at the place in prayer... God is able to clarify His will and teach us what to say when we pray.

4. Lack of capability. We lack the strength, we lack the energy, and we lack the steadfastness to pray. But the Spirit of God comes along and energizes our prayer lives. When we worship God in the Spirit, we are invigorated!

5. Lack of concentration. Is it strange to you how anything and everything will distract you when you finally try to pray? I'm convinced the devil will do anything he can to keep us from talking to God. So the Spirit of God does warfare against the enemy to help us concentrate when we pray.

As you learn to pray with the power of the Holy Spirit, I want you to remember God is at His strongest when we are at our weakest. Consider what the apostle Paul says in 2 Corinthians 12:8-10:

And He said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for My strength is made perfect in weakness." Therefore most gladly I will rather boast in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me. Therefore I take pleasure in infirmities, in reproaches, in needs, in persecutions, in distresses, for Christ's sake. For when I am weak, then I am strong.

Thanks be to God, when we are weak, He is strong! And He is trying to get every one of us to the point where we depend on His strength at all times...especially in the midst of our weaknesses.

That's why you should never be surprised when God just puts you flat on your back! He wants you to look up to Him! God will sometimes allow pain in our lives so that we might pray in dependence upon Him.

My friend, you must learn to depend upon the Holy Spirit in prayer just as you depend on Him for witnessing...for preaching...for speaking...for service...and for soul-winning. He is the One who is called along side to help you, the One who invests Himself within you to enable you to live for God.

And He is the only One who can help you pray with power!

Warren Buffet

Interview with the 2nd Richest Man in the World

There was a one-hour interview on CNBC with Warren Buffet, the second richest man who has donated $31 billion to charity.

Here are some very interesting aspects of his life:

He bought a small farm at age 14 with savings from delivering newspapers.
He still lives in the same small 3-bedroom house in mid-town Omaha that he bought after he got married 50 years ago. He says that he has everything he needs in that house. His house does not have a wall or a fence.
He drives his own car everywhere and does not have a driver or security people around him.
He never travels by private jet, although he owns the world's largest private jet company.
His company, Berkshire Hathaway, owns 63 companies. He writes only one letter each year to the CEOs of these companies, giving them goals for the year. He never holds meetings or calls them on a regular basis.
He has given his CEOs only two rules. Rule number 1: do not lose any of your shareholder’s money. Rule number 2: Do not forget rule number 1.
He does not socialize with the high society crowd. His past time, after he gets home, is to make himself some pop corn and watch television.
Bill Gates, the world’s richest man met him for the first time only 5 years ago. Bill Gates did not think he had anything in common with Warren Buffet. So he had scheduled his meeting only for half an hour. But when Gates met him, the meeting lasted for ten hours and Bill Gates became a devotee of Warren Buffet.
Warren Buffet does not carry a cell phone, nor has a computer on his desk.

His advice to young people:

Stay away from credit cards and invest in yourself. Remember money doesn't create man but it is the man who creates money.
Live your life as simple as you are.
Don't do what others say, just listen to them , but do what you feel good.
Don't go on brand names , just wear those things in which you feel comfortable in.
Don't waste your money on unnecessary things; just spend on what you really need.

Psalm 20:7

From: Gene Cooper
Subject: Word of the Lord
Date: Friday, August 15, 2008, 4:25 PM

Be vigilant and diligent to put your trust in ME, says the Lord. The temptation at this time is to put your faith in what you can see and understand, but you must realize that misplaced faith will not yield the fruit you desire. It will only take you further from MY plans and purposes for your life. Check your heart to discern and identify where you have placed your trust, and make adjustments as necessary.

Psalms 20:7, “Some trust in chariots, and some in horses; But we will remember the name of the LORD our God.”
Jeremiah 29:11, “For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says the LORD, thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you a future and a hope”

Apples to Wine

Women are like apples on trees. The best ones are at the top of the tree. Most men don't want to reach for the good ones because they are afraid of falling and getting hurt. Instead, they just take the rotten apples from the grounds that aren't as good, but easy.......

The apples at the top think something is wrong with them, when in reality, they're amazing. They just have to wait for the right man to come along, the one who's brave enough to climb all the way to the top of the tree.

Share this with other women who are good apples, even those who have already been picked!

Now Men.... Men are like a fine wine. They begin as grapes, and it's up to women to stomp the crap out of them until they turn into something acceptable to have dinner with.

Have Time?

A young man learns what's most important in life from the guy next door.

It had been some time since Jack had seen the old man. College, girls, career, and life itself got in the way. In fact, Jack moved clear across the country in pursuit of his dreams. There, in the rush of his busy life, Jack had little time to think about the past and often no time to spend with his wife and son. He was working on his future, and nothing could stop him.

Over the phone, his mother told him, 'Mr. Belser died last night. The funeral is Wednesday.' Memories flashed through his mind like an ol d newsreel as he sat quietly remembering his childhood days.

'Jack, did you hear me?'

'Oh, sorry, Mom Yes, I heard you. It's been so long since I
thought of him. I'm sorry, but I honestly thought he died years ago,' Jack said.

'Well, he didn't forget you. Every time I saw him he'd ask how you were doing. He'd reminisce about the many days you spent over 'his side of the fence' as he put it,' Mom told him.

'I loved that old house he lived in,' Jack said.

'You know, Jack, after your father died, Mr. Belser stepped in to make sure you had a man's influence in your life,' she said.

'He's the one who taught me carpentry,' he said. 'I wouldn't be in this business if it weren't for him. He spent a lot of time teaching me things he thought were important... Mom, I'll be there for the funeral,' Jack said.

As busy as he was, he kept his word. Jack caught the next flight to his hometown. Mr. Belser's funeral was small and uneventful. He had no children of his own, and most of his relatives had passed away.

The night before he had to return home Jack and his Mom stopped by to see the old house next door one more time.

Standing in the doorway, Jack paused for a moment. It was like crossing over into another dimension, a leap through space and time. The house was exactly as he remembered. Every step held memories. Every picture, every piece of furniture... Jack stopped suddenly.

'What's wrong, Jack?' his Mom asked

'The box is gone,' he said.

'What box?' Mom asked.

'There was a small gold box that he kept locked on top of his desk. I must have asked him a thousand times what was inside. All he'd ever tell me was 'the thing I value most,'' Jack said.

It was gone. Everything about the house was exactly how Jack remembered it, except for the box. He figured someone from the Belser family had taken it.

'Now I'll never know what was so valuable to him,' Jack said.

'I better get some sleep. I have an early flight home, Mom.'

It had been about two weeks since Mr. Belser died Returning home from work one day Jack discovered a note in his mailbox.. 'Signature required on a package. No one’s at home. Please stop by the main post office within the next three days,' the note read.

Early the next day Jack retrieved the package. The small box was old and looked like it had been mailed a hundred years a go. The handwriting was difficult to read, but the return address caught his attention. 'Mr. Harold Belser' it read. Jack took the box out to his car and ripped open the package. There inside was the gold box and an envelope. Jack's hands shook as he read the note inside.

'Upon my death, please forward this box and its contents to Jack Bennett. It's the thing I valued most in my life.' A small key was taped to the letter. His heart racing, as tears filling his eyes, Jack carefully unlocked the box. There inside he found a beautiful gold pocket watch.

Running his fingers slowly over the finely etched casing, he unlatched the cover. Inside he found these words engraved:

'Jack, Thanks for your time! -Harold Belser.'

'The thing he valued most was...my time.'

Jack held the watch for a few minutes, then called his office and cleared his appointments for the next two days. 'Why?' Janet, his assistant asked.

'I need some time to spend with my son,' he said.

'Oh, by the way, Janet, thanks for your time!'

'Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take but by the moments that take our breath away,'

Think about this. You may not realize it, but it's 100% true.

1. At least 2 people in this world love you so much they would die for you.
2. At least 15 people in this world love you in some way.
3. A smile from you can bring happiness to anyone, even if they don't like you.
4. Every night, SOMEONE thinks about you before they go to sleep.
5. You mean the world to someone.
6. If not for you, someone may not be living.
7. You are special and unique.
8. When you think you have no chance of getting what you want, you probably won't get it, but if you trust God to do what's best, and wait on His time, sooner or later, you will get it or something better.
9. When you make the biggest mistake ever, something good can still come from it.
10. When you think the world has turned its back on you, take a look: you most likely turned your back on the world.
11. Someone that you don't even know exists loves you.
12. Always remember the compliments you received. Forget about the rude remarks.
13. Always tell someone how you feel about them; you will feel much better when they know and you'll both be happy.
14. If you have a great friend, take the time to let them know that they are great.

To everyone who visits my site: Thanks for your time!!!

Become a Woman of Goodwill

by Sandy Coughlin

"Fools mock at making amends for sin, but goodwill is found among the upright." Proverbs 14: 9

After 17 years of marriage, I can look back and say that it was my job to love my husband, Paul. Not to change him. And it was God's job to make him good and my responsibility to express goodwill -- not condemnation.

Was I a woman of goodwill?

I was tested by this "goodwill" question when I married a Christian Nice Guy (CNG) seventeen years ago. A CNG, you might ask? I didn't realize that the daily abuse my husband suffered as a child would affect our everyday life together. What I thought were such "nice" Christian qualities in my husband when we married turned into frustrations and fireworks because of my husband's passive approach to life. Oh, don't get me wrong. My husband had amazing qualities, so that to this day I have never looked back.

What exactly is goodwill in a marriage?

Goodwill is a tangible, practical expression of love. Helpfulness, concern, care, friendly disposition -- are all related to goodwill and all lead to intimacy. It is the willingness to act in a spirit of cooperation, instead of trying to win arguments. It is proactive, alive, and dynamic. Goodwill is not a passive attribute. Goodwill is among the most concrete ways of expressing love and fostering intimacy, yet when we think about this word, we think of used clothing.

How do you know if you have it?

The will to do "good" toward your spouse is more than having good feelings for him (thank goodness). Though good feelings are important, goodwill also includes kindness, consideration, thoughtfulness, and practical support. This is wonderful news for CNG wives, because controlling how we feel is often harder than exerting our will to determine our good actions.

It's okay and even normal to have mixed feelings about my/your husband at times. For me, being an assertive woman, I found myself frustrated in this passive marriage. My husband lived under the radar of life. He felt that if he lived life safely, his problems would be few. And this affected the intimacy between us, though we both yearned for more depth in our relationship.

Intimacy is a choice, and you have to be available, present and vulnerable with one another. My CNG didn't always feel safe with me, so it was easier for him to not always "show up." It was difficult for him to make his wants and needs known and he didn't always come clean with how he felt. I found myself often walking on eggshells - not a fun way to live.

How do you lose goodwill?

Goodwill, present in most marriages when vows are exchanged, can become virtually buried under the rubble of anger, resentment and dwindling respect that builds over time. Coming to terms with these emotions is vital if you're going to give your efforts toward helping intimacy grow.

If you lack goodwill, take up the task of becoming a worthy steward of your husband's heart. It worked for me. I learned to be more supportive and understanding of my husband's wacky past, and I started pulling out my secret weapon -- empathy. I became a woman of goodwill when I made an effort to understand Paul more, and I stopped the nagging, coercing, attacking and shaming which in reality only pushed him further from me).

I came to the understanding that passive people are made (through life's experiences), and not born. I then started feeling more for Paul and becoming more empathetic toward him. My respect was strengthened as I became increasingly able to see his struggles in a healthier light. My respect for him was enhanced even more once he started being more open and honest, and he began to exert his will and express his feelings.

When it comes to love and intimacy, goodwill is like silverware: Almost everyone can learn how to use it, even though we weren't born knowing how, and even though some of us took a long time to try it. Goodwill is remarkably practical and beneficial for those who produce it and receive it.

(excerpts taken from Married but Not Engaged, Bethany House, 2006)

Ten Reasons You're Not Rich

Many people assume they aren't rich because they don't earn enough money. If I only earned a little more, I could save and invest better, they say. The problem with that theory is they were probably making exactly the same argument before their last several raises. Becoming a millionaire has less to do with how much you make, it's how you treat money in your daily life. The list of reasons you may not be rich doesn't end at 10. Caring what your neighbors think, not being patient, having bad habits, not having goals, not being prepared, trying to make a quick buck, relying on others to handle your money, investing in things you don't understand, being financially afraid and ignoring your finances.
Here are 10 more possible reasons you aren't rich:

1. You care what your car looks like: A car is a means of transportation to get from one place to another, but many people don't view it that way. Instead, they consider it a reflection of themselves and spend money every two years or so to impress others instead of driving the car for its entire useful life and investing the money saved.
2. You feel entitlement: If you believe you deserve to live a certain lifestyle, have certain things and spend a certain amount before you have earned to live that way, you will have to borrow money. That large chunk of debt will keep you from building wealth.
3. You lack diversification: There is a reason one of the oldest pieces of financial advice is to not keep all your eggs in a single basket. Having a diversified investment portfolio makes it much less likely that wealth will suddenly disappear.
4. You started too late: The magic of compound interest works best over long periods of time. If you find you're always saying there will be time to save and invest in a couple more years, you'll wake up one day to find retirement is just around the corner and there is still nothing in your retirement account.
5. You don't do what you enjoy: While your job doesn't necessarily need to be your dream job, you need to enjoy it. If you choose a job you don't like just for the money, you'll likely spend all that extra cash trying to relieve the stress of doing work you hate.
6. You don't like to learn: You may have assumed that once you graduated from college, there was no need to study or learn. That attitude might be enough to get you your first job or keep you employed, but it will never make you rich. A willingness to learn to improve your career and finances are essential if you want to eventually become wealthy.
7. You buy things you don't use: Take a look around your house, in the closets, basement, attic and garage and see if there are a lot of things you haven't used in the past year. If there are, chances are that all those things you purchased were wasted money that could have been used to increase your net worth.
8. You don't understand value: You buy things for any number of reasons besides the value that the purchase brings to you. This is not limited to those who feel the need to buy the most expensive items, but can also apply to those who always purchase the cheapest goods. Rarely are either the best value, and it's only when you learn to purchase good value that you have money left over to invest for your future.
9. Your house is too big: When you buy a house that is bigger than you can afford or need, you end up spending extra money on longer debt payments, increased taxes, higher upkeep and more things to fill it. Some people will try to argue that the increased value of the house makes it a good investment, but the truth is that unless you are willing to downgrade your living standards, which most people are not, it will never be a liquid asset or money that you can ever use and enjoy.
10. You fail to take advantage of opportunities: There has probably been more than one occasion where you heard about someone who has made it big and thought to yourself, "I could have thought of that." There are plenty of opportunities if you have the will and determination to keep your eyes open.

Abercrombie Shirt

Abercrombie Betsy

I love green...

something cool, something simple...

From Mars... From Venus...

If you are from Mars, read this...

1. When a girl says she's sad, but she isn't crying, it means she's crying in her heart.
2. When she ignores you after you've done something wrong, it's best to give her some time to cool down before touching her heart with an apology.
3. A girl can't find anything to hate about the guy she loves (which is why it is so hard for her to 'get over him' after the relationship's over.)
4. If a girl loves a guy, he will always be on her mind every minute of the day, even though she flirts with other guys.
5. When the guy she likes smiles and stares deep into her eyes, she will melt.
6. A girl likes to hear compliments, but usually is not sure how to react to them.
7. When a particular guy flirts with a girl very often, a girl would start thinking the guy likes her. So if you treat a girl just as a friend, go easy on the smiles and stare ok?
8. If you don't like a girl who likes you, break it to her gently.
9. If a girl starts avoiding you after you reject her, leave her alone for a while. If you still treat her as a friend, talk to her.
10. Girls enjoy talking about what they feel. Music, poetry, drawings and writing are ways of expressing themselves (which explains why most girls like writing journals).
11. Never tell a girl that she is useless in anyway.
12. Being too serious can turn a girl off.
13. When the guy she likes calls her for the first time, the girl may act uninterested during the call. But as soon as the phone is back on the hook, she will whoop with joy and immediately start telephoning her friends to spread the news.
14. A smile means a lot to a girl.
15. If you like a girl, try making friends with her first. Let her get to know you.
16. If a girl says she can't go out with you because she has to study, leave.
17. But if she still calls you or expect a call from you, stay.
18. Don't try to guess a girl's feelings. Ask her.
19. Hearing the words "I love you" is a great reassurance to a girl that she is beautiful.
20. After a girl falls in love with a guy, she'll wonder why she never noticed him before.
21. If you need tips on how to flirt with a girl, read romance stories.
22. When class pictures come out, a girl would first check who is standing next to her crush before actually looking at herself.
23. A girl's ex-crush will always be in her memory, but the guy she loves now stays in her heart.
24. Girls love having fun!
25. A simple 'H i' can brighten a girl's day.
26. The girl's best friends usually know best what she is feeling and going through.
27. Girls hate it when a guy pays attention to them just to get close to their 'prettier' friend.
28. Love means devotion, caring and happiness to a girl, in that order.
29. Some girls care about looks, some care about brains, but ALL girls want a guy who will love and care for them.
30. Girls want nothing more than to feel loved.

If you are from Venus, read this...

1. If a man wants you, nothing can keep him away. If he doesn't want you, nothing can make him stay.
2. Stop making excuses for a man and his behavior.
3. If you have ANY doubt in your mind about a man's character, leave Him alone.
4. Allow your intuition (or spirit) to save you from heartache.
5. Stop trying to change yourself for a relationship that's not meant to be.
6. Don't force an attraction.
7. Slower is better.
8. Never live your life for a man before you find what makes you truly happy.
9. If a relationship ends because the man was not treating you as you deserve then heck no you can't "be friends." A friend wouldn't mistreat a friend.
10. Have faith in God regarding your relationship, but don't let faith make you stupid. God does things decent and in order.
11. Don't settle.
12. If you feel like he is stringing you along, then he probably is.
13. If he keeps changing his mind about the relationship--take that as a BIG sign that he is unstable. Do you really want to be with a man like that?
14. Don't stay because you think "it will get better." You'll be mad at yourself a year later for staying when things are not better.
15. Honorable men take care of their business and aren't involved in a whole lot of mess.
16. The only person you can control in a relationship is you.
17. There's only one 'reason' a man dumps you; he doesn't want you.
18. Avoid men who've got a bunch of children by a bunch of different women. He didn't marry them when he got them pregnant, why would he treat you any differently?
19. You really do have to kiss a few frogs before finding the prince.
20. Always put yourself and your happiness first.
21. Always have your own set of friends separate from his.
22. Maintain boundaries in how a guy treats you. If something bothers you, speak up.
23. If he doesn't call, he just isn't that interested.
24. Be honest and upfront.
25. Know when to cut the cord, don't be strung along.
26. Don't fall for the "I'm confused role". Remove yourself from the situation to let him figure things out (but don't wait for him, move on).
27. If you want to have a clue as to how he will treat you, watch how he treats the WOMEN in his family (not just mom).
28. There's more than physical abuse, there's emotional and mental abuse. If he causes any of them...flee.
29. You cannot change a man's behaviors. Change comes from within.
30. Don't let him place rules on you that he is not willing to follow himself -- double-standard.
31. Do not make him into a quasi-god. He is a man, nothing more nothing less.
32. Demand respect and if he can't give it, he can't have you!
33. Don't compete with other woman, but be aware that men are attracted to what they see.
34. If you think he is cheating, he probably is. Confront him right away and if you feel he's lying, let him go.
35. Actions speak louder than words.
36. Never let a man define who you are.
37. Never rely on a man for compliments, look to yourself for that.
38. Never borrow someone else's man.
39. If he cheated with you, he'll cheat on you.
40. Just because he says he loves you, doesn't mean that he won't hurt you and it doesn't mean that you are meant to be w! ith him.
41. To use painful hard-won wisdom -- 'get it right' the next time.
42. Know that you deserve to be the number one person in the life of the #1 person in your life.

Lacing Style Information

A1. The lace is run straight across the bottom and emerges through both bottom eyelets 2. The laces then go straight up and are fed into the next set of eyelets up the shoe 3. The ends are crossed over and are fed under the vertical lace section on the opposite sides of the shoe before going straight up and into the next set of eyelets up the shoe 4. At the top set of eyelets, the laces can once again cross over and pass under the straight section as shown. This not only looks consistent with the rest of the lacing but also forms a High Lace Lock, which tightens the lacing even more firmly.


B1. The lace is run straight across the bottom and emerges through both bottom eyelets 2. The ends are looped back under the lace where it feeds under the side of the shoe 3. The ends are then crossed over each other, then they go under and out through the next set of eyelets up the shoe 4. Steps 2 and 3 are repeated until both ends reach the top eyelets.

C1. The lace runs straight across the second set of eyelets from the top of the shoe 2. Cross the ends over and feed into the fourth set of eyelets, skipping the third set 3. Continue down the shoe, two sets of eyelets at a time 4. At the bottom, run the laces vertically between the bottom and second from bottom eyelets 5. Double back and work your way back up the shoe through the vacant sets of eyelets.

D1. The lace is run straight across the bottom and emerges through both bottom eyelets 2. The left (red) end is spiralled up the left side of the shoe, with the end fed under and emerging from each eyelet 3. The right (orange) lace is spiralled up the right side of the shoe, at each eyelet looping through the left (blue) lace in the middle of the shoe before feeding under and emerging from the next eyelet.

E1. The lace is run straight across the bottom and emerges through both bottom eyelets 2. One end of the lace (orange end) runs straight up the right side, is fed into and runs straight across the second set of eyelets 3. Both ends now run straight up the left side, each skipping one eyelet before feeding in two eyelets higher up 4. Continue running both ends across the shoe, then straight up two eyelets at a time 5. At the top of the shoe, the laces end up on the same side and the shoelace knot is tied at that point.

F1. The lace runs straight across the bottom and the ends are fed into both bottom eyelets 2. One end of the lace (orange end) runs straight up the right side, emerges from and runs straight across the second set of eyelets 3. The other end (red end) runs diagonally underneath and, skipping the 2nd set of eyelets, emerges from and runs straight across the 3rd set of eyelets 4. Continue running each lace diagonally across and up 2 sets of eyelets until one end (orange in my example) reaches the top right eyelet 5. The other end (red in my example) then runs straight up the left side to emerge from the top left eyelet.

G1. The lace runs straight across and emerges from the third set of eyelets from the bottom 2. Both ends run straight down and are fed into the second set of eyelets from the bottom 3. Both ends again run straight down and emerge from the bottom set of eyelets 4. Both ends now run straight up along the outside and are fed into the fourth set of eyelets (the first vacant pair) 5. The ends are crossed over each other, then they go under and out through the next set of eyelets up the shoe 6. Repeat step (5) until both ends reach the top.

H1. The lace is run straight across the bottom and is fed into rather than emerging from both bottom eyelets 2. The ends are crossed over, then inserted into the next set of eyelets up the shoe 3. This process is repeated until both ends reach the top eyelets and end up inside.

I1. The lace runs straight across the bottom and emerges through both bottom eyelets 2. Skipping two sets of eyelets, cross the ends over and feed into the fourth set of eyelets 3. Both ends now run straight down one eyelet and emerge from the third set of eyelets 4. Continue up the shoe, each time crossing over and going up three sets of eyelets, then straight down to emerge from the next set of eyelets below.

J1. The lace is run straight across the bottom and emerges through both bottom eyelets 2. The ends are twisted together with one complete twist in the middle of the shoe 3. The ends then continue across to the opposite sides, where they go under and out through the next set of eyelets up the shoe 4. This process is repeated until both ends reach the top eyelets.

K1. The lace runs straight across the bottom and emerges from both bottom eyelets 2. Cross the ends over and feed into the 4th set of eyelets up the shoe (skip past 2 sets of eyelets) 3. Both ends now run straight up and emerge from the 5th set of eyelets 4. Cross the ends over and feed into the 2nd set of eyelets up the shoe (skip past 2 sets of eyelets) 5. Both ends now run straight up and emerge from the 3rd set of eyelets 6. Cross the ends over, feed under and emerge from the top set of eyelets (skip past 2 sets of eyelets).

L1. The lace is run diagonally and emerges from the bottom left and the top right eyelets 2. The top (red) end of the lace is zig-zagged from the top set of eyelets down to the middle eyelets in a similar manner to the Shoe Shop Lacing 3. The bottom (orange) end of the lace is similarly zig-zagged from the bottom set of eyelets up to the middle eyelets.


M1. Start with two pairs of different colour laces, preferably the wide, flat variety (I was lucky to receive two such pairs with my last runners!) 2. With one colour (orange in my example), lace the shoe using either Straight (Fashion) or Straight (Lazy) Lacing 3. With the other colour (red in my example), start at the bottom of the shoe and weave the lace in and out of the other lace until you reach the top 4. Fold around the top lace and head back down, weaving out and in until you reach the bottom 5. Continue across the shoe until you're out of room or out of lace, whichever comes first 6. Tuck all the loose ends of the laces into the shoe.


N1. The lace runs straight across the bottom and emerges from both bottom eyelets 2. Cross the ends over and feed into the 4th set of eyelets up the shoe (skip past 2 sets of eyelets) 3. Both ends now run straight up and emerge from the 5th set of eyelets 4. Cross the ends over and feed into the 2nd set of eyelets up the shoe (skip past 2 sets of eyelets) 5. Both ends now run straight up and emerge from the 3rd set of eyelets 6. Cross the ends over, feed under and emerge from the top set of eyelets (skip past 2 sets of eyelets).

Christian Ways To Reduce Stress

An Angel says, "Never borrow from the future. If you worry about what may happen tomorrow and it doesn't happen, you have worried in vain. Even if it does happen, you have to worry twice."

• Pray
• Go to bed on time.
• Get up on time so you can start the day unrushed.
• Say No to projects that won't fit into your time schedule, or that will compromise your mental health.
• Delegate tasks to capable others.
• Simplify and unclutter your life.
• Less is more. (Although one is often not enough, two are often too many.)
• Allow extra time to do things and to get to places.
• Pace yourself. Spread out big changes and difficult projects over time; don't lump the hard things all together.
• Take one day at a time.
• Separate worries from concerns. If a situation is a concern, find out what God would have you do and let go of the anxiety. If you can't do anything about a situation, forget it.
• Live within your budget; don't use credit cards for ordinary purchases.
• Have backups; an extra car key in your wallet, an extra house key buried in the garden, extra stamps, etc.
• K.M.S. (Keep Mouth Shut). This single piece of advice can prevent an enormous amount of trouble.
• Do something for the Kid in You everyday.
• Carry a Bible with you to read while waiting in line.
• Get enough rest.
• Eat right.
• Get organized so everything has its place.
• Listen to a tape while driving that can help improve your quality of life.
• Write down thoughts and inspirations.
• Every day, find time to be alone.
• Having problems? Talk to God on the spot. Try to nip small problems in the bud. Don't wait until it's time to go to bed to try and pray.
• Make friends with Godly people.
• Keep a folder of favorite scriptures on hand.
• Remember that the shortest bridge between despair and hope is often a good "Thank you Jesus."
• Laugh.
• Laugh some more!
• Take your work seriously, but not yourself at all.
• Develop a forgiving attitude (most people are doing the best they can).
• Be kind to unkind people (they probably need it the most).
• Sit on your ego.
• Talk less; listen more.
• Slow down.
• Remind yourself that you are not the general manager of the universe.
• Every night before bed, think of one thing you're grateful for that you've never been grateful for before. GOD HAS A WAY OF TURNING THINGS AROUND FOR YOU. "If God is for us, who can be against us?" (Romans 8:31)

Sales... Sales... Sales

This is new to me but I'm actually excited to be in this account. New insights, new knowledge, new everything...

I'll be on training starting tomorrow, now I'm just listening to recordings of agents handling calls.

I'll be in GY forever but the restdays are SUN-SAT. I miss my Nijo and Babe!!!

Duties of a Christian Wife?

Bible.com

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THE CHRISTIAN WIFE

by Betty Miller

In Titus 2:3-5, women are given some instructions regarding their husbands, children and homes. "The aged women likewise, that they be in behaviour as becometh holiness, not false accusers, not given to much wine, teachers of good things; That they may teach the young women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children...that the word of God be not blasphemed." One thing we notice about these verses is that the older women are instructed to teach the younger women how to love their husbands. In our society we have the idea that when we fall in love with a man, this love (emotion) will keep the marriage together. This is far from the truth. Of course, emotional love is part of marriage, but the kind of love that the Scripture is referring to here in these verses has to be taught and learned. It is God's love as spoken of in 1 Corinthians 13. We might also call it character.

The first step in learning how to love a husband, or anyone else for that matter, is to receive Christ into our hearts and let Him become our teacher. As we love Him and He loves us, that love spills over to those around us. We learn how to love others through reading, studying and applying God's Word to our hearts and our lives. Those who are older and more experienced can share with the younger ladies in order that they may be spared many heartaches by heeding their godly advice. Let us not think that we have all the answers but truly be open to the advice of those who are older and wiser whether they be in the church, or part of our family. Remember, the first commandment with a promise is the one that says, "Honour thy father and thy mother: that thy days may be long upon the land which the Lord thy God giveth thee" (Exodus 20:12).

Even as small children, if we fail to obey our parents, our days can be shortened. For example, if a parent tells his child not to play in the street and he disobeys, he can be killed. God places elders as leaders and guides to help the younger Christians to mature. We need a submissive spirit to be able to learn from others.

A necessary ingredient for a compatible union, in spite of the abuses that occur when men are wrongly taught about their headship, is that women submit to their husbands. What does God expect of women in this area? First of all, we must understand that submission is an attitude and not just an action. Submission begins in the heart. There is a story about a little boy that was instructed by his teacher to sit down and be quiet. Because of his rebellious nature he did not want to do this, but was forced to by his teacher. Later, the children in the class were chiding him by saying, "Boy, you really sat down and shut up when the teacher approached you with the paddle." The rebellious boy replied,"I may have been sitting down on the outside, but I was still standing up on the inside."

Many times women who claim to be submissive are only outwardly going through the motions of submission while inwardly they are still resenting their position in life. A prayer of submission would be in order: "Father, help me to be content in the role you created me for and give me a submissive spirit, not only toward my mate, but also toward each member in the body of Christ. Let me serve and not expect to be served. Create within me a lamb-like spirit even as Christ our Lord had. Amen." Of course, as we have mentioned, there are limits to submission as it should always be "as unto the Lord." We must first submit to God and then the problems involving submission to others will be resolved by Him. Some results that can occur when women are not in a right relationship with men are divorce, rebellious children, emotional problems and sexual frigidity.

One of the main causes for these problems is an evil spiritual force of female domination. In I Corinthians 11:3, Ephesians 5:22-25, and Ephesians 6:1-3, the divine order for families is stated. The husband is the head, then the wife is second in command, with the children in obedience to them. When the woman seeks to usurp this authority and rule the home, havoc results and the home is left wide open for Satanic attack. "As for my people, children are their oppressors, and women rule over them. O my people, they which lead thee cause thee to err, and destroy the way of thy paths" (Isaiah 3:12). In our land today, children are rebellious, causing strife in the homes, and women have become bossy and demanding. It is no wonder homes are falling apart. This type of spirit in a woman is a "Jezebel spirit." Just as Jezebel ruled her husband, King Ahab, in the Bible (I Kings 21:25), many women today are guilty of the same sin. This domineering and ruling spirit is not just found in women alone for we see it in men, too, when they use tyrannical means to rule their homes. The Lord would have our homes be examples of love, and the authority should be exercised in love. When someone has a "Jezebel spirit," it subtly manipulates the lives of everyone around him. Should we be guilty of this domineering spirit, let us ask the Lord to deliver us and create within us a sweet submissive spirit that is pleasing to the Lord. We will then be willing to listen to our husbands, knowing that the logic God gave man is for the protection of the woman.

Man's logic and ideas, coupled with a woman's sensitivity, blend to aid each other in making decisions. Learning to hear the voice of the Lord is one area where both husband and wife can confirm to each other what the Spirit is saying as they each seek the will of God on any given circumstance. The woman will usually have a certain inclination about it, while the man will have a definite idea regarding the situation. The ideal is, of course, for both husband and wife to walk totally submitted unto the Lord. When this is not the case, the woman should not disregard her husband's advice, for the Lord can and does speak through unsaved husbands. When the wife is submitted to the Lord, the Lord will deal with her husband. Extreme submission where the wife never offers advice to her husband, or is never allowed to think for herself, is out of balance as God did not intend any human being to be another's "door mat." This is an example of that domineering "Jezebel spirit." People under this kind of dominance need deliverance, as do the ones imposing their domineering spirit. The Lord wants every area and dimension of our lives to be balanced in Him.

CHRISTIAN DUTIES OF WIVES AND MOTHERS

Another area where Satan tries to push women to extremes is in keeping household duties and spiritual pursuits in balance. Women who are unequally yoked are especially vulnerable in this area. Perhaps you know women who serve their husbands "tapes for breakfast," "Charismatic book reviews for lunch," and "Praise-the-Lord's for dinner." If this is not done under the Holy Spirit's unction and with His wisdom, it can turn husbands away from, not toward the Lord. A change of diet might speak more loudly than incessant talking about Jesus. A neat house, nice meals, and a genuine interest in the husband and his interests many times speaks louder than all the tapes. To fulfill her household duties, a woman may have to give up some of her "spiritual" activities. Three meetings a week really do not make us spiritual anyway.

Real love is giving up what we would like to do in order to make another happy. We have all heard the old saying, "The way to a man's heart is through his stomach." If a wife has claimed her husband's heart for Jesus, she might try reaching it through his stomach, if all else has failed. Then, when he asks why the sudden change, she can humbly say the Lord spoke to her about neglecting him and the home, and that Jesus very much wants happy homes and happy husbands. He will be interested in knowing a God like that. It works with rebellious kids, too, applied a little differently. Many of our family members are really crying out for love through their very acts of rebellion. Let's remember to spend time with them, as God gave us the home first.

Some wives neglect their husbands and homes by engaging in too many spiritual pursuits. Of course, the opposite problem can also exist in our homes. Other problems arise when wives are so neat and fastidious about their homes that so much time is spent on cleaning and cooking that they neglect the much needed time of family worship and fellowship. Houses then become a "shrine" to be admired, placing more emphasis on the residence than the residents. Women can become "Marthas" instead of "Marys.''

"Now it came to pass, as they went, that he entered into a certain village: and a certain woman named Martha received him into her house. And she had a sister called Mary, which also sat at Jesus' feet, and heard his word. But Martha was cumbered about much serving, and came to him, and said, Lord, dost thou not care that my sister hath left me to serve alone? bid her therefore that she help me. And Jesus answered and said unto her, Martha, Martha, thou art careful and troubled about many things: But one thing is needful: and Mary hath chosen that good part, which shall not be taken away from her" (Luke 10:38-42).

The Lord wants both areas balanced in our lives, so let us remember not to be so "heavenly minded" that we are no "earthly good." And on the other hand, let's not get so earthbound that we miss the beauty of the Spirit.

The woman has her primary responsibility in the home since the Scripture says she is to be the keeper of the home. "To be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed" (Titus 2:5). Preparing meals for the family is one of her prime duties. The world has set the standard when it comes to eating, rather than the Word of God. Here is another area where we need to be sensitive to the Holy Spirit's guidance. Besides seeing to it that each member receives spiritual food, the Lord is emphasizing to His people that they need to make changes in their physical diets and receive the proper natural foods. Most of God's people have experienced His healing hand in their bodies, but one problem that seems to be prevalent is that after receiving healing, the devil comes to rob them of God's gift of healing. If we exercise our faith and rebuke the enemy in the name of Jesus, he will flee. If, however, you have done this and are still experiencing illness, perhaps the problem is one of maintaining the gift God has given you. By this I mean we must not only obey and keep spiritual laws, but also we must keep physical laws if we expect to walk in God's blessings.

Our body is the temple of the Holy Spirit, and many of our temples are filled with trash and garbage. Yet we expect the Holy Spirit to abide there, too. As women, we can be instrumental in ministering the proper food to our families. Instead of eating according to the present mode, we need to eat according to God's Word. The Bible has much to say about diet and eating. Of course, the extreme we should avoid here is to become so "food-minded" that we allow cooking and diet to absorb too much of our time. Obesity has become such a problem for so many people in the U.S.A. that we need to seek God to control our appetites and help us in this all important area. The Lord wants us to learn self-discipline and temperance in all things. In and of ourselves, we may not be able to overcome our old eating habits, but through prayer, with the Lord's help, "I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me" (Philippians 4:13).

Proverbs 31:10-31 gives us an excellent description of an ideal wife and mother. Verse 28 says, "Her children arise up, and call her blessed; her husband also and he praiseth her." As wives and mothers we should examine our lives to see where we fall short and ask God to help us be like the companion and mother spoken about in these verses. Do our children call us blessed? What about our husbands? Are they praising us as wives? Perhaps our children are rebellious at this time; maybe our husbands are far from the Christian ideal, and neither is praising nor blessing us. Do we blame them and insist that the Lord change them, or do we look at ourselves and ask the Lord to turn the searchlight upon our own faults and failures so that He might work a change in us? Our number one problem is not our children, our mates, our job, or our circumstances--it is ourselves. Until we are willing to change ourselves, the Lord cannot begin the needed changes in our families.

How does God effect these changes in our lives? First of all, we must be honest with God and face our shortcomings and sins. We must come confessing, "God, I am resentful toward this person; I can't help it; I don't want to be like this; help me change. Lord, help me to be the kind of wife and mother that will inspire my husband and children to rise up and call me blessed. Amen." As we yield to the Lord and follow His promptings, we shall surely see changes in our lives and in the lives of those we love.

We must begin by seeing the kind of woman we are. The woman in Proverbs 31:28, "Her children arise up and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praiseth her," or the one in Proverbs 21:19, "It is better to dwell in the wilderness, than with a contentious and an angry woman." I'm sure our desire is that we fit into the category of the first type, for we certainly do not want to be referred to as angry and contentious. But I wonder, if we honestly examined our hearts and motives and let the Lord turn His searchlight on us, if we might not see some areas where anger and contention do exist in our lives. Perhaps we do not openly voice our anger, but inside we feel it toward our husbands or children; and because we do not voice it, we have feelings of resentment toward them.

Jesus, in the New Testament, talked much about our thought life and our inner feelings. Remember as he spoke to the religious leaders of His day, He reproved them for their evil hearts even though their outward deeds appeared to be right and good. We can outwardly do our duties as mothers and wives, but inside our hearts we may not really be lovingly ministering to them. We may be motivated by duty, not love. None of us really appreciate people doing things for us simply because it is their job. The real witness to others is when we do something simply because we love them. A lot of Spirit-filled Christians are eager to show the love of Jesus to everyone else, but those of their own households often suffer from a lack of love. Let us certainly show the love of Jesus to all we meet, but let's remember to show it in our homes first, asking the Lord to give us the true Spirit of love in performing our daily chores."Lord, may we turn the daily tasks into celebrations of love. Amen.''

This article is taken from the book Neither Male Nor Female by Betty Miller.

CRITICAL WORDS DESTROY MARRIAGES

by Betty Miller

1 Peter 3:7-12:

7 "Likewise, ye husbands, dwell with them according to knowledge, giving honour unto the wife, as unto the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life; that your prayers be not hindered.
8 Finally, be ye all of one mind, having compassion one of another, love as brethren, be pitiful, be courteous:
9 Not rendering evil for evil, or railing for railing: but contrariwise blessing; knowing that ye are thereunto called, that ye should inherit a blessing.
10 For he that will love life, and see good days, let him refrain his tongue from evil, and his lips that they speak no guile:
11 Let him eschew evil, and do good; let him seek peace, and ensue it.
12 For the eyes of the Lord are over the righteous, and his ears are open unto their prayers: but the face of the Lord is against them that do evil."

One of the things that begin to erode a marriage away is when one spouse begins to speak critically to and of the other one. The things we say to and about the other one can either be uplifting and encouraging or they can bring disharmony and hurt. Little critical words will lead to a dissatisfaction with one's mate and can escalate to bring about a divorce. No person should threaten to divorce the other just to get their way, or manipulate the other to do something they really don't want to do. When any one threatens divorce this is like speaking words of murder to your marriage.

Words can accumulate in the spirit and cause one to react lovingly or hateful by what is spoken. The above verses warn each spouse not to return "railing for railing" but "blessing for a railing." As kind words are returned this stops the cycle of "railing for railing."

Proverbs 15:1 says, "A soft answer turneth away wrath: but grievous words stir up anger."

We are admonished in the Bible to seek to do good and to seek peace, not to stir up trouble because we want to air our anger and wrath. As Christians we are to give our anger to Jesus and ask Him to remove it, and replace it with His love, patience and forgiveness. We are not to take it out on someone else, especially our mates.

Some husbands can be very cruel criticizing their wives appearance. If the wife is on the thin side or over-weight, the husband should pray to help her make the necessary changes that will help her to be healthy, but never should he belittle her appearance. This can damage their relationship, where it is difficult for her to reach out and love him and receive love from him. (This, of course, applies to a woman criticizing her husband about his appearance too.)

The Lord calls us to love our mates, as we would love a sister or brother in the Lord and to be courteous. Many times, after people get married, they cease to be courteous to one another and they are rude and unmannerly. These things start with little things they quit doing to please the other and soon they grow into gross neglect. We should be kind to one another and think about saying nice things that edify and build our marriages instead of the hurtful words that tear them down. This "little fox" of critical speech in little things can be the root cause that later destroys the marriage.

Proverbs 18:21: "Death and life are in the power of the tongue: and they that love it shall eat the fruit thereof.
22 Whoso findeth a wife findeth a good thing, and obtaineth favour of the LORD."

Garlic Odor

Worried about the foul smell of garlic after chopping one?
How many times do you have to wash your hands with the best smelling soap and yet your fingers still have that garlic aroma?

I got this tip from my hubby... Mind you, it works!!!

I'm sure you have stainless steel knife, spoon or any utensil. Habout stainless steel sink?
If you have any of those, then you wouldn't have any problem. Simply rub your fingers or hands with any of the above mentioned kitchen tools. In seconds, your hands would not be stinking.

Psalm 31:24

From: Gene Cooper
Subject: Word of the Lord
To: "Gene Cooper"
Date: Friday, 29 August, 2008, 5:12 PM

For those who are still in transition, I tell you that the enemy is trying to seduce you into putting your hope in what the world can offer. But, I say, that true hope that will put down roots, grow upward and produce fruit is not in material gain and worldly dreams, but is rooted and grounded in the Lord. Now is the time to get your priorities in order and truly realize the source of your provision and blessing. Trust in Me, says the Lord.

Psalms 31:24 Be of good courage, and He shall strengthen your heart, All you who hope in the LORD.
Matthew 6:33 "But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things shall be added to you.

Pareto Principle

I love this...

"DO NOT LOOK BACK AND ASK WHY, LOOK FORWARD AND ASK WHY NOT"

A very valuable lesson to learn ...

Interesting quote from the movie "Why did I get married?" In most cases, especially in relationships, you will only get 80% of what you NEED and you will hardly get the other 20% that you WANT in your relationship. There is always another person (man or women) that you will meet and that will offer you the other 20% which is lacking in your relationship that you WANT And believe me, 20% looks really good when you are not getting it at all in your current relationship. But the problem is that you will always be tempted to leave that good 80% that you know you have, thinking that you will get something better with the other 20% that you WANT But as reality has proven, in most cases, you will always end up with having the 20% that you WANT and loosing the 80% that you really NEED and that you already had. Be careful in deciding between what you WANT and NEED in your life.

Adultery happens when you start looking for what you don't have. "Wow, this girl in my office is a real looker. But it's not her Wynona Rider features that got me. I'm crazy about her because she's also understanding, intelligent, tender - so many things that my spouse is not" Somewhere along the way, you'll find a woman or a man who will be more charming or sensitive. More alluring. More thoughtful. Richer. Have greater sex appeal. And you will find a woman or man who will need you and pursue you and go loco over you more than your spouse ever did. Because no wife or husband is perfect. Because a spouse will only have 80% of what you're looking for. So adultery takes place when a husband or wife looks for the missing 20%. Let's say your wife is melancholic by nature. You may find yourself drawn to the pretty clerk who has a cherry laugh no matter what she says: "I broke my arm yesterday, Hahahaha . . .." Or because your wife is a homebody in slippers and pajamas, smelling of garlic and fish oil, you may fall for a fresh-smelling young sales representative that visits your office in a sharp black blazer, high heels, and a red pencil-cut skirt Or because your husband is the quiet type, your heart may skip a beat when you meet an old college flame who has the makings of a talk show host. But wait! That's only 20% of what you don't have. Don't throw away the 80% that you already have! That's not all. Add to your spouse's 80% the 100% that represents all the years that you have been with each other. The storms you have weathered together. The unforgettable moments of sadness and joy as a couple. The many adjustments you have made to love the other. The wealth of memories that you've accumulated as lovers. Adultery happens when you start looking for what you don't have. But faithfulness happens when you start thanking God for what you already have. But I'm not just talking about marriage. I'm talking about life! About your jobs. About your friends. About your children. About your lifestyles. Are you like the economy airline passenger that perennially peeks through the door of the first class cabin, obsessed with what he's missing? "They have got more leg room! Oh my, their food is served in porcelain! Wow, their seats recline at an 80% angle and they've got personal videos!" I guarantee you'll be miserable for the entire trip! Don't live your life like that. Forget about what the world says is first class. Do you know that there are many first class passengers who are miserable in first class -- because they are not riding in a private Lear Jet? The main message??? If you start appreciating what you have right now, wherever you are, you are first class!