The Joy of Marriage GOD's WayBaverly LaHaye
UNCONDITIONAL LOVE - the number one love need for women, the same need as for their husband. But unconditional love only comes from one source - JESUS CHRIST. When couples finally realize who Christ is in their lives and seek to have their emptiness filled by HIM and HIM alone, they are able to love each other much more fully.
So how can a husband meet his wife's need for unconditional love?
- Women need the assurance that they are loved just as they are and that their husbands will stick to them no matter what. A simple, "You never have to earn my love because I love you no matter what," can already make their day!!!
- They need their husbands to remind them that GOD loves them and to seek comfort in HIS love.
- Their husband's unconditional love is highlighted by their response to women's failure and disappointment. Words like, "I will always be here for you," can inspire women not to give up.
EMOTIONAL INTIMACY - men and women have different connotations on this love need. Men spell it S-E-X and women spell is T-A-L-K. When neglected, it is easy to look at someone else's husband and think he's the ideal man. Women are emotionally wired. It's critical that every woman knows that the very man she's searching for is actually the one she's married to.
SPIRITUAL INTIMACY - many women long for spiritual connection with their respective husbands. They yearn for their spouse to be a spiritual sounding board, as well as their leader and guide.
For some men, discussing spiritual matters feels intimidating. A wife should take the initiative to take their spouse's hand at mealtime to pray with her. Or maybe ask him, "Could we pray right before we go to sleep?" There's really nothing to bond a couple so securely other than prayer.
Two people grow together through prayer.
ENCOURAGEMENT - when a husband affirms his wife, when he reminds her of how important she is to the family, when he says, "I think you're the best wife anybody can have," or "Honey, I love growing old with you," or "I appreciate your care and attention to our family," or "My worst day with you is better than the best day without you." (hehe... I added this one!!!)
FRIENDSHIP - this is not possible in marriage if husband and wife don't spend time developing it. The husband must be his wife's best friend, and vice versa. Friendship with your partner is different from friendship with your other friends.
When you have a friendship, you nurture it. You delight in bringing out the best in that person and you dream dreams together.
Philippians 2:1-3
"If you have any encouragement from being united with Christ, if any comfort from his love, if any fellowship with the Spirit, if any tenderness and compassion, 2then make my joy complete by being like-minded, having the same love, being one in spirit and purpose.3Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves."